You Don’t Really Want to Get Better
Of course psychotherapy clients want relief from their symptoms, depression, anxiety, and other painful emotions. But at the same time, they don’t want to change the fundamental defenses that would...
View ArticleThe Fantasy Bond or Primary Defense
This is the first in a series of blogs describing my theoretical approach known as Separation Theory. It represents an integration of psychoanalytic and existential systems of thought and describes how...
View ArticleThe Paradox of Psychological Defenses
Should we contend with painful realities or avoid them? Although psychological defenses offer a degree of comfort and a form of security, they also predispose distortion and maladaptation in adult...
View ArticleVoice Therapy
In my last blog, I described the “voice” as a series of negative thoughts and attitudes toward self and others, which are at the core of a person’s self-destructive ideology and behavior. As such, the...
View ArticleInsight into the Violent Mind
Both glamorizing and demonizing violence help us avoid having to understand the violent mind. We should enter the violent person’s subjective world, not just in order to be able to offer treatment, but...
View ArticleAn Overview of Separation Theory
Separation Theory integrates psychoanalytic and existential systems of thought by showing how early interpersonal pain, and separation anxiety and later death anxiety lead to the development of...
View ArticleHow to Go “All In” in a Relationship (Without Losing Yourself)
As a therapist, I spend a good amount of time exploring the push and pull that occurs in relationships. For example, between couples, a lot of friction occurs when one person is wanting more closeness,...
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